Tag: Dutch

  • Dutch Journalists Tricked by ‘Magic’ Mushroom Ban Opponents

    You would think that journalists’ intelligence and street smarts prevents them from falling for hoaxes, but recent attempts to show the insanity of the Dutch ‘magic’ mushroom ban by opponents of the ban show otherwise.

    Ridiculing the mushroom ban, a website called PaddoBestrijding.nl (Shroom Removal) has been created promoting a service that supposedly helps keep innocent people safe from the long arm of the law. PaddoBestrijding’s press release reports that home-, land- and gardenowners as well as nature preservation organisations risk prosecution over ownership of one of the 186 mushroom types banned in The Netherlands, starting the 1st of December. This could lead to sentence of up to 6 year imprisonment or a 740,000 euro fine.

    The ban is quite controversial as I’ve stated before in the following two articles:

    One of the mushrooms getting banned is the Fly Agaric, or Amanita muscaria (picture below, by Roger B.), a popular mushroom in European folklore (and in Super Mario), one of our nature’s beauties, and a popular sacrament in ritual shamanic use. Looks like the Christian Democrats are still on a witchhunt, with the aid of the Labour Party.

    The Fly Agaric is one of the mushrooms illegalized in the Netherlands

    It took me a second to figure out that PaddoBestrijding was an eleborate hoax, but three sections of the site really give it away and I’m stumped that journalists didn’t get the joke. Then again, the Dutch government did try to ban the use of satire once (1, 2, 3). The pages that really give the spoof away are the methods, testimonials and shroom of the month. Some translated quotes from the various pages:

    ShroomRemoval about methods:

    “Depending on the scale of infection and the soil type, we choose for a surface-, or a depth treatment. With the latter a fungicide is sprayed into the soil under high pressure as deep as 70 cm. Thankfully this is not always necessary and most of the time a surface spray can be utilized, after which the fungi killing substances slowly seep into the soil. Modern fungicides are extremely poisonous, meaning that only a small amount has to be used; a comforting thought.

    If that last sentence doesn’t give it away, maybe one of the silly testimonials might:

    “When we could access our garden again, eight weeks after the mushroom removal, all mushrooms were gone. We were warned about dead animals, but luckily it wasn’t that bad. The plantgrowth has recovered a bit by now and every now and then we’re also seeing some birds in our garden again. In a few years we will once again be able to safely eat from our garden.”

    Hellooooo gullible journalists… you got it yet?! No? How about the mushroom of the month, where an opposition to the new mushroom ban is subcommunicated. Strange, for a company that can profit so much from this, no? Here it goes:

    “Even though the ‘orange funnel’ (Rickenella fibula) doesn’t contain psylocibin or other related tryptamines, it has still been put on the list of banned mushroom types under the aged synonym ‘gerronema fibula‘.”

    All of this, combined with pictures of people in yellow suits and gas masks spraying toxic chemicals should raise some doubts in the mind of journalists, but nope, they fell for the hoax. An eleborate and modern version of the type of jokes Provo’s played on Dutch society, which I blogged about before.

    I must admit that as I started writing this article I wasn’t 100% sure about this being a joke. Since I don’t want to spread misinformation, I did some research, like any self-respecting journalist should. Through some very simple domain name research I found out that MushMush.nl registered PaddoBestrijding.nl. MushMush was selling magic mushroom growkits until the ban and talks about growing methods. So of course it is a hoax!

    So far ShroomRemoval has been featured in the following media:

    • Spits (Rush Hour), one of the biggest (if not the biggest) free newspapers in Holland. [web article, newspaper clipping (from the frontpage apparently)]
    • NOS Headlines on 3FM (Radio), one of Holland’s most popular radio stations. [online, direct download]
    • FunX (Radio), popular radio station for teenagers and other people with a poor taste in music. The two DJ’s spoke with a representative of PaddoBestrijding on the air and showed particularly gullible behaviour and nauseating stupidity. 😉 [direct download]

    Just shows how gullible the media is and makes one think twice about the trustworthiness of news. With one I mean me, and hopefully you too.

    BasBasBas.com is about a Dutch student living in Istanbul. I regularly write about my adventures in Istanbul and travels in the region. If you’d like to stay up to date, you can subscribe to my RSS feed or get email updates in your inbox. You can also follow me on Twitter.

  • The Dutch Tradition of Sinterklaas

    Photo by FaceMePLS

    Said to be the origin of Santa Clause, the Dutch tradition of Sinterklaas is one of the most typical traditions one can experience in the Netherlands (besides Queen’s Day). Sinterklaas means Sint Klaas, or Saint Nicholas in English. On December 5th, Dutch families get together and exchange gifts. If the family has young children, Sinterklaas himself brings the presents to the door or through the chimney, usually in secrecy (especially when using the latter ;-)) or it’s done by one or more of his helpers. This leads me to the first oddity about this day of the Greek-Anatolian saint, Saint Nicholas of Myra.

    Black Petes

    That’s the name of the helpers. When Sinterklaas comes to Holland on his steamship from Spain in November, he brings along his cheeky helpers which then give out candies to the children. Yes, he’s from Turkey, but comes from Spain, I don’t know why. I suppose he’s an expat like me. Back to the helpers… They have different functions. One is the guiding Pete, the other does poems, the other sings, the other climbs, the other rhymes, the other wraps the presents and they all have nicknames based on their function, much like the Smurfs.

    Originally the Petes looked like south Europeans, but over the course of 50 years, they started getting darker and darker and around 1900 they looked likedarkies‘. Until this day, this is still the day us Dutchies dress up to entertain our kids, as shown on the right (picture by Merlijn Hoek). The Saint and his helper, that was called a servant and a slave in a book that influenced much of current day traditions, are normally seen as friends and the Petes gladly help Sinterklaas, because he’s old and cannot go around the whole country on his own. You can view the 19th century book that established much of the current day Sinterklaas tradition online.

    When people started saying that this is racist, we started saying they’re black because of all the chimneys they have to climb through to deliver their presents. It’s a well-known scientific fact that soot from chimneys of houses with children living in them also causes afros and big red lips. Political correctness created Petes with faces painted in purple, green, yellow, you name it. This was not a big hit. Back to the chimney explanation it is.

    Through the chimney, into your shoes

    When Sinterklaas is in the country in the weeks leading up to the 5th of December, the children are allowed to put their shoe under the chimney twice a week or so, depending on the parents’ generosity (and willingness to spoil their kids). I suppose the tradition varies a bit from home to home, but when I was young my brothers and I would first draw a picture for Sinterklaas. Then before going to bed we’d put one of our shoes under the chimney, with the rolled up drawing in it, a carrot for Sinterklaas’ horse, and we’d sing Sinterklaas songs at the chimney. We would then go to bed and the next morning we’d find a small present (usually candy) in our shoe! Schools and even supermarkets also let children leave their shoe overnight for Sinterklaas.

    Photo by poederbach

    Usually the candy you get will be kruidnoten or pepernoten, which are small ginger-bread like biscuits or speculaas-like biscuits (as seen above). You’re also likely to receive a chocolate letter of the first letter of your name. These are cleverly nicknamed “chocolade letters”, because this holiday’s a feast of creativity! I have an aunt whose name begins with the letter I, so when she was young she always got the first letter of her second name, the R. Much bigger, at least to a child, since they all weigh the same. So, candy from the chimney!

    Oh, unless you’ve been a bad child that is.

    Kidnapped and taken to Spain

    Children are warned that if they are not behaving well during the year, Sinterklaas will look in his Golden book and will not be able to find your name (which means no presents). One popular song goes “Wie goed is krijgt lekkers, wie stout is de roe” which means that who is nice will get something sweet, but who’s bad will get a bundle of sticks in his shoe (a roe). If you’ve been particularly bad, you will be put in one of the sacks which Sinterklaas and his jolly slaves Black Petes use to take all the presents to Holland and you will be taken back to Spain. In recent years Sinterklaas has condemned this practice, saying that it was a thing of the past. Still 400 children are reported missing in Holland each year though. What are you hiding Sinterklaasje?

    Presents!

    That’s what he’s hiding. Usually they’re dropped down the chimney overnight and unpacked in the company of family in the evening of the 5th of December. In my youth we’d be at our home with my relatives on the 5th and as my parents were cooking or doing whatever in the kitchen, someone would ring the doorbell and the presents would be there. As we grew older, faster and more familiar with what to expect, my poor parents had to increase their speed to run from the frontdoor around the house and back into the kitchen. If I remember correctly, usually my mom would come into the room and keep us busy for a moment saying “Heeeeeyyyy! Who do you think that is? Could it be…?” andddd it’s a blurry memory, but I think they made us sing a song before having a look at the front door.

    The presents are often accompanied by poems, composed by the Poetry Pete (or the Rap Pete in families with parents that try to be too hip). The child receiving the gift has to read the often wittily composed poem out loud as seen on the right (picture by hondjevandirkie). The poem often says things about the person receiving the gifts and hints about the content of the wrapping paper.

    The unravelled wrapping paper is usually a welcome and interesting object for pets, cats and dogs alike. I am not aware of turtles’ attitude towards wrapping paper lying all over the living room floor. But then again, I don’t care.

    If the parents actually managed to convince Sinterklaas to come to their home to deliver the presents personally, children are often left arguing at school over who had the real Sinterklaas coming to their home and who had a “helping Klaas” over. It’s very important to be right in this case, even though in the end you’re all wrong. Some kids already know this and spread seeds of doubt among their fellow classmates over the reality of Sinterklaas, those damn fascist toddlers.

    Have fun!

    That wraps it all up (no pun intended). For expats in the Netherlands, you can have a look at the Sinterklaas survival guide on Expatica. For lazy Dutchies, you can make your poems using a Sinterklaas poem generator.

    I wish everybody lots of fun with Sinterklaas this year! Especially my family. Sorry I can’t be there for the festivities for the second year in a row. Last year I celebrated Sinterklaas with some international exchange students while I was living in Sofia, Bulgaria (see the pictures). This year I’m avoiding the tradition – even though I live in Saint Nicholas’ country… Turkey!

    I know similar traditions take place all over the world, especially in Europe. What about in your country? Can you tell me a little about the December traditions where you’re from or where you currently live?

    BasBasBas.com is about a Dutch student living in Istanbul. I regularly write about my adventures in Istanbul and travels in the region. If you’d like to stay up to date, you can subscribe to my RSS feed or get email updates in your inbox. You can also follow me on Twitter.

  • Netherlands to ban ‘magic’ mushrooms starting December 1

    Dutch Christian Democrat minister of Public Health, Ab Klink, has announced the ban of selling and growing ‘magic mushrooms’, or shrooms, will take place on December 1. This knee-jerk reaction follows a media and political hype caused last year by the suicide of a 17-year old French tourist who was said to be under the influence of mushrooms at that time. It was also her second suicide attempt.

    Politicians got riled up as the media started covering every mushroom mishap in Amsterdam. Since nobody really stopped campaigning since the last government was formed – as they’re doomed to fail – they saw this as a good chance to speak up, speak out and win votes. At the cost of liberty and sanity.

    Ab Klink, minister of Public Health, previously asked the Coördinationpoint for the Assessment and Monitoring of new drugs (CAM) to research illegalizing shrooms. They concluded that these are the risks involving mushrooms:

    • Health of the individual: no risk.
    • Public health / society: minimal risk.
    • Public order / safety: minimal risk.
    • Criminal involvement: no risk.

    The CAM advised against a ban on mushrooms for the following reasons:

    • The smartshops selling the mushrooms might replace them by substances which carry more risk;
    • It will lead to shrooms being sold in tablet-form, like XTC pills;
    • Users would pick mushrooms in nature, which could lead to serious problems if they mistake the wrong type of mushrooms for the ones they are looking for;
    • Users might switch to other drugs, which might be more interesting from a criminal perspective and possibly carry more risk for usage… Leading to more danger to the public;
    • The banning of mushrooms is a rather tough sanction given the current problems its causing;
    • Maintaining a ban would bring costs.

    What did Ab Klink do? Ban them! Of course. The CAM was surprised as this is the first time a minister has ignored the advice of this advice organ. Minister Klink is obviously tripping. Or maybe he’d like to see the Bible as our lawbook?

    Dutch ‘smartshops’ that sell magic mushrooms and other legal mind-altering substances are taking this to court. For updates on this matter you can follow Dutch blog Red De Paddo (Save The Shroom).

    Recently a Christian Democrat politician called for the closing of all coffeeshops in Holland and illegalizing cannabis. In a follow-up poll, Dutch citizens expressed their opinions about the Dutch policy regarding drugs. 36% want coffeeshops illegalized, but 34% wants to see them completely legalized. Coffeeshops in Holland are currently in a grey area, more can be read about this in the article below or on Wikipedia. In short the sale of softdrugs is legal in Holland, but supplying coffeeshops of them is not.

    Last year I wrote about the pending mushroom ban in several articles, one of which is reposted below, the others can be found via these links:

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    Below a repost of my article Dutch government to ban cultural identity. (more…)

  • The Orange Dream

    Holland clears the field after losing to Russia

    It’s over. Done. During the qualifications, Dutch coach van Basten got a lot of criticism, but when the Euro 2008 was there, he amazed everyone. Fans, being skeptical and pessimistic about the Dutch team’s prospects, partly because of Holland’s spot in the ‘group of death’, were surprised by the team’s great victory over France. Hope grew, orange fever exploded and increasingly people started talking about Holland’s chance to take the cup. As Holland had another convincing victory against Italy and beat Romania with a largely substitute team, sky seemed the limit.

    Will they win? Will we finally do it? Will this be the team, the combination, that we will speak about for generations to come?

    It was not to be.

    Russia played a great match and simply did better than Holland. No luck, no referee mistakes, they were simply the better team of the match. Holland created some hope in the second half by scoring an equalising goal, but this hope soon faded as Russia’s team clearly had more energy left in overtime. It’s the end of Marco van Basten as coach of the Dutch team, the last time goalie van der Sar played for the team (one of the greatest Dutch football players ever, in my eyes), and it must be bitter for Boulahrouz who is mourning the death of his child that was born prematurely last Wednesday.

    This means there’s only one thing left to do.

    Root for Turkey!

    Turkish team cheers after win

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